argh..i'm seriously thinking that something is wrong with me this year man..i am just so lazy and not really doing my work..i'm also getting more tired haha probably due to the fact that i am getting older..not really paying attention in class also..hiyo just what is happening to me man..well anyway yesterday was just one long day in sch having a vocal concert at night which almost made me deaf cause charlyn wanted to sit in front..haha went to bugis 3 times yesterday for shopping man..charlyn just fell in love with the new hello kitty section seiyu have..today another boring day..watched a movie today but actually fell asleep during the middle part..in the afternoon went to MITA building to see a blind artist and her drawings..due to extreme hunger of eating only bread for lunch,i was fidgeting here and there man..was so glad when i was able to go home..then for the first time i actually sat the northeast line..its so nice lor..so fast and reached outram park in just a mere 3 mins!!haha..then came home n stone..darn this is how i am leading my life man..haha

8:13 PM

     
i'm back!!haha...its such a boring day today man..dunno wad homework i have and dunno wad to do..well went to parkway parade today to shop and when on the way walking back to the carpark saw lifeng with her bf..well just said hi then went off already lar..hmm..nothing much to say so i guess its back to sucky sch tomorrow with the first hatred lesson with mini ang..

5:52 PM

     
hiyo stupid com is so slow again..well went with xb to acjc funfair today..i would say quite successful man..those ppl i don't one to see i ended up seeing them n those i want to see..never got to see them..haha..xb saw all the ppl she wanted to see lar..saw her friend alymer..then later we were talking bout tl then she got excited cause guess wad..tl was just standing there though his back was facing us so actually i didn't get to see his face though xb said he got turn back..then saw matilda..she never change at all lar..hmm..saw hazel tan,aileen,mark and john cheng,kwang hao,usha,shermain,deeg,alex,nicholas and bernice..think i didnt miss anyone out..was trying to find someone but it was just so confusing that i gave up finding..haha seriously there were so many sajc ppl there that i wondered whether it was acjc funfair or sajc..me and xb walk round the sch like crazy before settling down for some food..was there bout 4 hrs dunno doing wad lar..so tired man when i came home..took a nice refreshing bathe due to all the sweat man..wow i can conclude acjc is a really rich sch man..dunno why they still need to have a funfair..practically everything is being sponsored by rich ppl..like say a pasta stall..the sauce,beef and spaghetti all are given free so in fact there is no cost at all..and they even had kenny rogers ppl selling the wonderful chicken..just tasted so good..ok enough of food..going to take my rest now..tataz

8:02 PM

     
as usual today no sch..nothing amazing happened lar just that probably if nothing to do tmr,will be going to acjc funfair with mx,xb and sc they wanna go..darn..there is just nothing to do..in contradiction to this statement..actually i have lots of homework lar just that super lazy to do..feeling much better today then yesterday..well going to read some emails now since nothing much to do n hopefully will be able to find a nice template to change..

7:34 PM

     
hmm..it suddenly just seems i haven been online for quite some time though it was only last week..but just this week alone so many things have happened or should i say some news were just rather shocking to me..lets see..firstly liz,rach and laureen all have gone back to melbourne to study..sad to say won't see them until june or december..couldn't send rach and laureen off cause their flights were in the morning but managed to go with wilson to send liz off..seriously dunno why i have been so extremely tired this week at sch man..its like just physically exhausted lar..hmm..found out some shocking news today which i am unable to say due to the fact that i may hurt that person but i just dunno how am i going to face the person for another 3 years knowing this fact man..well just have to continue acting normal but there will absolutely be some times when its better just to avoid the person..really have to figure out what am i going to do..hmm what else..oh ya some ppl really made me very annoyed yesterday n the day before man..just a brief summary in general..i realise that we can't be friendly to certain ppl in sch man..there will just be some ppl behind to make sure of that and dowan us to say hi..unbelievable man..its just saying hi only but cause of the protective nature well we just can't..its so irritating man..ok another thing is..don't be too indecisive cause it will lead u to nowhere..be firm bout your decision n stand by it cause by being too indecisive,it will make ppl around u feel extremely irritated with your constant 'dunno' bout things..oh ya..met mr hoo on tues..so freaking seeing him after so long cause went for a music career talk at the cca branch and he has to be there..well actually got many more things to say but suddenly my mind is in a total blank state so shall continue when i remember..tataz..

8:32 PM

     
haha now am in music tech lab class..some stupid teacher was being a bitch man this morning..went scolding us like nobody's business..just who does she think she is..she said just cause we are late..we won't make it in this society..i mean huh!!just cause we are late!!really a bitch..went on scolding us for 15mins then when 1 classmate ask a question she flare her top even more man..argh..she can just spoil my day man..if u were in her class u will think she is super unreasonable..hmm..later going to meet liz,huimin,rach and mx..though cannot stay for long..well..had a gd bdae dinner with deeg,shaun,huimin,liz,gen and shu..haha ate 40 plates at sakae sushi at suntec though in fact shaun didn't want to go there cause he saw one of his friend which made him lose his appetite..then on valentine's day went out with sc,huimin,zhiyu,laureen,xb and zeebut..met sc first then while walking to meet the rest,this girl approached me and sc and gave us a rose each..haha..at first thought had to pay so rejected her but since it was free then we took it lar..haha...we told xb the rose was from mr T..haha..of course she didnt believe lar..oh ya..thanks rach and xb for the lovely gift vouchers..after a heavy dinner at pizza hut..me huimin xb and sc continued our journey..went to heeren and saw jovan there..ending stop was going to starbucks at paragon to stone..heard some interesting conversation from the next table..hmm..yesterday had lunch at crystal jade with family and relatives..at night also had a nice dinner with wynn lynn,gretchen,tiffany,dominic,zhen,sis and extended family lar..hiah..have to do some score writing now but just too lazy and no mood to do..ok better go do some now..talk later ppl..tataz..

2:30 PM

     
well well well..have been so busy with sch and the amount of work that i don't even have time to come online to check mails n blog..yay..today i am officially 18!!a Big hApPy bDaE tO mE!!haha..one year older now so suppose to be more mature but all the same lar..haha..then lets see hmm..oh ya wanna thank all those who gave me presents yesterday..charlyn,peifeng,peifang,pei li,kai er,zhong liang,emmanuel,gwen and yiling..thanks for all the lovely presents..really appreciate them..yesterday also bought a new pair of slippers..haha..mphosis(is that how u spell it?)is having a 50-70% sale storewide ppl till the 19th feb..then after that went out with gwen to far east for shopping trip..after a long walk gwen finally bought 2 tops..saw alex and deeg there also..wondered what are they doing in a girl clothes shop..tonight going out with liz they all to celebrate my bdae dinner..well it will be fun lar catching up with all of them..so sian later still need to go sch for presentation which i have been doing all week..hope i know what to say man..but anyway..this is a lovely day..hahahahaha...tataz

1:44 PM

     
argh...i just realise i blog yesterday but it wasn't posted so i have to write all over again!!well..nothing much lar actually..went out with xb, mx, rach and ka ka on fri night for dinner cause ka ka is leaving today for melbourne..hmm..everyone is going overseas except me!!haha..outing was quite fun lar..hear rach n mx sing all the crapped songs..had dinner at marche then headed to lido to slack..guess i'm feeling better already lar cause i am just so busy with my stupid presentation to think bout other things..then yesterday suppose to go for steamboat with liz,min,gen,shu and zh but it was cancelled cause everyone cannot make it..dunno when it is going to be held now..everyone is like going back to aussie already..time flies so fast..then today went shopping for a while..realise OG is a store where all the aunties like to go man..its so diff from robinsons..then later mom followed me to the esplanade to do some research..met tang qi and shuhan there..its a lousy place to do research lar..nothing much..rushed down to reference library..luckily had everything i wanted there..was pretty annoyed by some ppl but thats another story..came home n rushed doing my presentation the whole night..just as i was about to finish..decide to check email n guess wad..tutorial has been postpond..arghhhhh..i rushed on my presentation for nothing man..felt so angry but relieved also lar..haha..mixed emotions..ok going off now to do some more work..tmr going for a poetry talk at SMU..darn...

10:13 PM

     
well guess i'm getting better as the days goes ahead..hmm..yesterday went out with xb, mx, rach and ka ka who joined us much later..saw charissa with her bf at the mrt station..she looked very diff man..then later saw charity and also lin lin together with jennifer..mx and rach entertained us the whole time lar with their songs haha..talked about all the rubbish n crap haha..went walking round orchard then headed to marche for dinner..after that went to lido to slack..was quite fun lar with them cheering me up..then today suppose to go for steamboat with liz,min,gen,shu and zh but was cancelled..stayed at home n tried doing my presentation homework but failed cause couldn't find any info at all..hiah..tmr have to go to esplanade to do some research already..so sad everyone who is studying in aussie is going back soon..so it will be some time when i next see them again..k nothing much to write now so will be gone for now:)

9:45 PM

     
well what can i say..these few days have been days filled with remorse, hurt suffering n all other stuff lar..some things are meant to be understand while some things are not..but why does it have to happen now..i also don't know what am i suppose to do bout it..haha everyone knows i can put on a brave front really well but maybe its just i do not want to express my feelings n emotions..its strange though..how i can always listen to everyone problems n be there for them but its hard for me to tell ppl my problems instead so i rather don't tell..anyway well just hope it will be over soon..well today went sch for a while..had boring lessons n i just realise how lazy i am this term man..just no motivation to do any work..then during break went to national library to do some research with glenn..after boring sch went for a mini shopping trip with charlyn, gwen n may..we saw vanessa n jovan along the way which to say i would rather not see due to some misfortunate things we saw..then later i thought gwen was stalking them cause she went inside the bookshop..was there for a while when i was just staring out into space thinking..then saw this group of ppl walking in who were quite familiar..haha..was charlyn's friends..then me n charlyn told gwen zm was there..wow her face turned red immediately man..it was so funny..the whole time from the bookshop to the mrt station gwen was so happy man though she didn't want to admit it..zm looked different though without the spike hair..sad to say he didn't sit the same train as her but as though we didn't talk lar haha..well came home n felt the fear again..dunno wad fear lar..just that i realise i cannot be alone these few days or i will start imagining the worst of things man..hmm..i dunno wad am i going to do this weekend man but just want it all to be over..

9:02 PM

     
arghhhhhh...so long never come online already due to the fact that my com was spoilt for the last few days..luckily it was fixed n all my programmes are still intact..but i guess these few days lots of things have happened also putting me not in a very pleasant mood..i guess sunday one of the worst days of my life man..first computer repair man didn't come then later some change of plans here n there..then some distant cousins came to my house..spill drinks all over..can't believe it man..drink also cannot drink properly n not say they are small kids..but i think the worst event was at night lar..found out some news from my friend..i guess in a way i kinda expected it lar but only denied the truth from myself for quite some time..well i was quite sad lar cause my relationship with this 'friend' is now on the rock cause of this..but i am also quite hurt due to this cause its like i was taken for granted for such a long time..i mean what am i to this person lor..i think i have been some kind of fool lar..a gullible n blur one to be in this situation..all these time am i just playing a game or what..its so hurting to find out something like that..i am like living in a world of dreams n have just woken up to face reality..whats going to happen next..there are just so many things i want to question him but i guess i also don't want to know the answers..what have i been doing all these while..n i just dunno what to do now..should i forgive this person or not?i have so many things to say but just can't write it out..it won't be easy forgetting this incident lar but i guess i have to and just move on..its getting the hold of me already these few days..feeling so down that i do not even want to go to sch..wats going to happen in the future??!!..but i am also thankful lar that xb have been helping me to get through this..*thanks*..well just hope i am able to get through this quickly lar but i know it won't be easy..should i just act ignorant?that is one question to ponder..

4:58 PM